We're Forgetting About AIDS

As I waited for the bus today, another bus passed across the street with a giant Kenneth Cole Ad which read" We're ForGetiing AIDS. And all I could do was shake my head and think how true it is. I am recently single again and so have been discussing these issues more with my girlfriends and I have been utterly surprised and baffled by their attitudes about sex.

Case in point: One of my girlfriends is extremely intelligent, went to a good university, law school, works for one of the top law firms. She is on top of everything- wouldn't dream of paying a bill late, has substantial savings, just all around has her stuff together. She recently found out that someone that she has a casual sexual relationship with has had 75 sexual partners in his life!!! They don't use protection. This is the same woman who wouldn't drink after me if all we had was one canteen and we'd been walking across the Sahara desert for ten days.

But, this is not an isolated case. Out of all the single friends I've discussed this with, not one of them practices safe sex even most of the time. I understand that sometimes things happen and mistakes are made, but none of them even really seems concerned about it or tries to make it a regular practice. And they all have justifications. "He's a doctor- I know he doesn't have anything." (Honey, do you really think you are the ONLY person he's having unprotected sex with?) or "I'm on birth control." (Please, a baby is not the worst thing that could happen to you!) Or "He doesn't like to use them." (If he doesn't like to use them with you then he doesn't like to use them with anybody.) Or the ever popular "He didn't have a condom." (Hmmm, make him go to Duane Reade and get some or better yet, carry your own.") Most of my friends wouldn't dream of carrying their own condoms because they'll "look like a slut." In general, I tend to carry one even if I have absolutely no plans of using it. I think it's just a good habit. And if you insist on seeming innocent and pure, wait until it's clear that he doesn't have one to present your own. But really, if it gets that far and he wasn't planning on using anything, I would have to rethink this person as a potential partner.